Wednesday, October 17, 2018

“In war, there are no unwounded soldiers”

March 21, 2011 by  
Filed under Bras & Boots, Most Recent Posts

I was 17 years old when recruiters came to my high school giving the ASVAB (The Armed Services Vocational Aptitude Battery). I went and took the test, mainly to get out of class. Typical high school kid. I never thought about it again until I became pregnant my senior year. The army seemed like a good way for me to provide for my child.

I left my baby when he was just six weeks old to go to basic training and AIT. I came back just shy of his first birthday. I thought by joining the National Guard, I was safe from deployment. Wrong. Just before my son turned two, my unit was activated, and we left for Iraq. I was a 19 year old girl who had a son and had never left my Momma’s side. I was in theater for a year. I saw things that most teenagers will never see. I figured though, being that I got out unscathed, meaning I had all my limbs, etc., that I was fine.

My son turned three right after we came home. At first, life was great. As the months went on, however, I noticed I was really detached. Nothing, good or bad, had any affect on me. I became very angry about missing the time with my son and just everything in general. Simple things, such as the toaster burning my toast, would end with a toaster thrown across the room. All I wanted to do was find a way to be the sweet, happy girl I once was. I finally saw a doctor and was diagnosed with PTSD.

That was 7 years ago, and I still have some of these issues. People don’t realize that some war injuries are not visible to the eye. I once read a quote that seemed to bring it all together for me: “In war, there are no unwounded soldiers.” Now I am married with two children and making progress everyday. It takes time and understanding patience from the people in your life to deal with this. I don’t think it ever goes away, we just learn and educate ourselves on how to deal with it.

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